In short, however, the point is simply that Her Imperial Excellency Penelope Larken, High Leader of the Declared Free Rebellion Territory of Upper Devonia had declared war upon the entire nation state of Canada which at the time was still a nation state worthy of such a declaration.
It too was to the point. Short. Succinct. And, if not presumed to be regarded with anything more serious than a raised eyebrow or a furrowed brow, meant with the utmost sincerity.
The Territory of Upper Devonia was declared thus free.
The Territory of Upper Devonia was assumed thus in rebellion.
The Territory of Upper Devonia was pronounced thus at war.
Empress Penny typed the message into her text message gadget, colloquially referred to as [REDACTED], and without so much as bothering to fix the four grammatical errors she had introduced into her thought through her efforts of brevity and pointed clarity, engaged the trigger that would fire the first shot across one-third of the distance around the [REDACTED].
“It is sent!” She shouted at the crowd. There were hundreds gathered on the expansive concrete pad that served as a temporary storage area attached to a large commercial vendor for the many private vehicles that had been used to facilitate that same gathering, and also the others who were there to spend money at the vendor and not necessarily to participate in that historical moment.
The air was still quite brisk, even for a spring day in early April, and though it was not strictly cold outside, the words of Empress Penny hung in the air as a puff of frost even as they rung clear across the crowd.
“Now,” she pronounced, enunciating each syllable loudly and with all the vocal volume that her days as Treasurer of the Parent Council of Mill Gardens Elementary School had trained her, “we are destined for freedom from the cruel reach of an unlawful government.”
The crowd cheered.
“Now we fight for our land and ourselves. I say fuck the rest of them!”
Note that readers of this historical record who are offended by the blunt language of the subjects of this study should brace themselves.
The colloquial patter spent under the populist flag is rife with rough lingo. It is no less a hallmark, a symbol of the banality of thought that drives the movement. The jingoist language often bubbles with a kind of deliberate informality that throughout this historical narrative will become apparent as little more than an adornment, or even just an affectation by the emergent leadership.
Empress Penny, it was rumoured and documented in the publication [REDACTED], patiently practiced in front of a mirror each morning, cursing and cussing at her own reflection for upwards of thirty minutes filling the gaps of her teeth flossing and generous application of cosmetics and aggressively swirling cotton swab sticks in her ear canals.